right now is write write write. but after tommorrow when I can, all I’m gonna wanna do is sit at the window and stare stare stare at the page and think of everything instead of writing it. why do I always do this?!?!? fjignriuntgrh.
thinking that I was and always have been, the same person that I am today.
And although I knew that to some degree people change, I did not believe that at any given time, I was a different me than I was two years ago.
Or two months ago.
Or two weeks ago.
It’s no little known fact that teenagers suffer from the epidemic known as identity crisis, but I beg to differ. I’ve come to realize that it is not so much about finding an identity, but rather about keeping up with the changes of identity we see in ourselves. If young adults were a separate species, then we are the most vulnerable kind of human beings there are. It takes so very little to take me and change me into a new version of myself.
Whether it be a book, a person, a summer, or a sentence that you may have spoken to me, all of that inevitably changes my own perception of myself—and honestly, who wouldn’t find that hard? Who wouldn’t find it difficult to navigate life knowing that each time they look in the mirror; they may not be the same?
This so called identity crisis is our teenaged great perhaps. It is the acknowledgement that when it comes to ourselves, we know nothing except endless possibilities. We only know that tomorrow we will be different, next month we will be changed, and next year, we may not even recognize ourselves anymore. Our big maybe is just the hope that with every shift the world makes in us, it makes a change for a better.
I can only hope that at the end of it all, whenever my young adult crisis’s are over, that when I arrive at a final “me”, it is one that I find better than the other one’s that came before it. That I benefited from my great perhaps in finding a person that I can be content to be for the rest of my life.
I may or may not be tumblr mass-posting tonight. :P
I’ve decided to take my moleskin art pages and post them individually, instead of that collage i stuck them in over the summer. I like them alot and think that they’d be cooler if people could read them.
Also, for my school’s literary magazine, we had to decorate notecards in sort of the same fashion (words and images, etc.) so I’ll be putting up those too hopefully. :) everything will eventually be linked to my DA as well, if i’m feeling extremely proactive tonight…